SDMCC Title text

The Swindon and District Motor Cycle Club (SDMCC)

Reports

The latest event reports are listed below.

Watch out!! There's a Humphris about...

Hoult Cup Trial
by Bretton King

Some things in life are predictable - day follows night, autumn follows summer, Round 3 follows Round 2 in the Swindon club's 2011 Championship and... Rob Scott heads for the title of Club Champion again!

The first Thursday evening trial of the series was staged at the ever-changing Crappers recycling centre, where gulleys and cambers were joined by a hill climb for the first time thanks to the perpetual earthmoving that goes on at the Wootton Bassett venue. Sections to test and tease rather than terrorise were marked out by clerk of the course Bert Kington and helper Sam Linch-Mieal, and, according to all riders, they did just that. The wooded gulley posed a few questions to the field, but the main mark stealer turned out to be the innocuous section 7 where the loose earth boulders constantly shifted, making a clear-cut line impossible. Rob Scott and Michael Johnson both excelled here, dropping just two each. In fact, the pair were very evenly matched throughout the evening, except for one moment when Michael managed to clock a five on the twisty gulley of number 1 and that maximum gave him too much distance behind Rob. The father-son battle between Martyn and Ben Wilmore went down to the wire too, Martyn faltering with a last lap five to give young'un a 3 mark victory over the multi-British champion. Ex-British Enduro champion Keith "I'm not a wouss" Wooster managed to complete all the laps on the evening rather than stopping halfway through the event which has become a trait of his recently, and he slaughtered the remaining AB opposition by over a hundred marks, so congratulations to him for getting round the boggy and swampy terrain.

Another predictable feature of the series is a ding-dong battle between Adrian Steele and Andy Perry, and I'm delighted to report that they didn't disappoint - on this occasion Adrian took the spoils but Andy is sure to get revenge next time.

Another father-son combination excelled on the evening as Ollie and Andy Humphris each won their class. Ollie was particularly impressive as he rode the Expert route and only dropped 8, which put him second overall on the evening. The sister-sister duel of the night was Victoria and Maisie Payne, the former triumphing by 6 marks. Finally, a tie break had to be used to separate the Over 50 contenders, with Terry Cole outwitting Graham Lavis by virtue of having one more dab than 'GL!'.

Thanks to all the officials who stood out til dusk - we look forward to seeing all riders and helpers again on June 19th for Round 4 at the same venue.

Results


Best Overall Rob Scott (250 Gas Gas) 6 m.l.
Best A Michael Johnson (125 SXS Beta) 11
Best AB Gibber Wooster (290 Sherker) 20
Best B Adrian Steele (300 Gas Gas) 11
Best C Andy Humphris (250 Gas Gas) 13
YB (hard) Ollie Humphris (125 Gas Gas) 8
YA (standard) Bertie Hayes (125 Gas Gas) 35
YB (standard) Victoria Payne (125 RAW Beta) 29
Twinshock Mark Stokes (250 Ossa Gripper) 31
Over 50 Terry Cole (250 Beta) 6

The Muntjac 2011
by Neil PB

First round of the British Enduro Championship and SDMCC have five riders competing 4 in E3 Clubman Class and 1 in E1 Clubman Class. They are Keith Wooster (2009 E3 Champion) from now on known as Fritz. You remember Germanic looking legs! Richard Peaker from now on known as Bic (because I can). Dave Griffiths (what bridleway) and Lyndon Jack or Fingers for short and Craig (no I`m ok I`ve brought my own food!) Beattie. We all set off on Saturday 3 of us in Bic`s camper van and 2 in Fingers truck towing the trailer full of bikes and kit. Arrive mid afternoon and set up camp and here comes the rain. We go off to walk the special test and Knighter is just ahead if us. It’s the closet we are likely to get to him on the track all weekend. Soaked from walking the test we get changed and head off into town for beer, grub and all importantly watch England turn over the French at Rugby. Little did we realise what a cultural evening we were in for!!

We are in the Flint Knapper pub in Brandon with a beer just started to watch the rugby when in walks one of our Polish worker friends obviously a little worse for wear (pissed too be precise). He’s a short stout gentleman but built like the proverbial brick s!it house. He staggers towards us removing his hat and coat and asking each and every one of us “red or black you choose” repeatedly. Being the last in line I need to make a choice as he’s looking straight at me (I think!) waiting for an answer. Red I say waiting for what ever comes next. If it’s a punch or head butt I should be able to cope as he’s so drunk I should see it coming from a week away and there’s 5 of us to jump on him and pin him down! But no instead to my surprise I get a pat on the back and a loud shout of “come on Man Utd and who is blue they are nothing fuck you” The penny drops and I realise he is on about Man Utd and Wigan game today Blue not Black. We are put through several rounds of “Red or Blue you choose fuck you” from are Polish friend while he tries to get a pint of Hoffmiester off of the woman serving behind the bar. After several times of telling him they don’t do Hoffmiester and missing the opportunity to tell the guy he’s had enough the dozy mare gives him a pint of Stella. We are now told he is 33 years old and asks how old are we and after each response to his question we get a “fuck you”. It’s all pretty harmless and quite comical and he even thinks Fingers is a funny guy and asks him if he wants a fight!
Rugby over we leave to find some where to eat and say goodbye to our new friend. Who sends us off with a curt “f%ck you”.

Spend a cold night in the tent where the temp drops below freezing and I’m put through the Chinese water torture. The condensation from my breath has frozen on the inside of the tent and as it thaws it drips all over me with annoying regularity but I’m to cold to move.

Get up about 6.30am jump around a bit to warm up then go into Bic`s camper where the rest of them are still in their warms beds “GITS”. Kettles on and soon everybody’s up sorting their stuff and taking the bikes for scrutineering. Bic and I load up the pit trolley and suitably attired (new red jackets that Bic has bought advertising his timing business, www.Timingit.com, nice job) head off for the pit area. We see all the Swindon lads start and go off to see the special test and the Championship riders through first. An awesome sight they are just so quick over the ground. We see all the lads through the test and they all put in reasonable times, head back to the pits for their first stop and check. All in on time and only two causes for concern. Dave has forgotten to wash out his camel back and believes he’s poisoned himself and can’t get rid of the bad taste in his mouth. Lyndon is struggling again with “duveted” fingers and comments it’s like riding in a big pile of compost, but decides to carry on. Bic and I both believe they are all really going to struggle not to loose a fair amount of time. The checks are really tight and getting tighter for each lap. We are proved right as the only person not drop any time is Knighter and he only achieves this with 15sec to spare.

Second test, Craig dumps it and loses time 20 sec compared to his first test time and is not happy, but finishes 14th Clubman 4th E1/4. Fritz ups his game on the second test and puts in a 20 sec quicker lap finishing 26th Clubman 8th E3. Dave not use to there being no Bridleways puts in a slower second lap, sighting lack of fluids a big factor but still finishes a credible 50th Clubman 12th E3. Fingers retires after 2 laps with fast asleep fingers at this point we now believe they are comatose. He has enjoyed the experience and best of all for me was to watch him go through the second test pirouetting around the first few corners without a care in the world waving at the spectators, priceless!
Pack up and home. Another great weekend had by one and all with many stories to regale especially our Polish friend with his eloquent use of the English language. Red or Blue is stuck in my head. Still a new greeting for club nights I suppose!!

Thanks to the lads for putting up with me but I’m not sleeping in that bloody tent again. Sorry for the delay in writing this report very busy at work and recent laser eye surgery has hampered my abilities!!! If you believe that you’ll believe anything. Now selling my bike to pay for said surgery so all offers welcome. (I'll give you a £1 for the 'berg! - webmaster)

I hope to be riding in the next event so someone else will have to take on the mantle of Pit Bitch. Won’t be the wife though for some reason she doesn’t like to be called a bitch?

Sorry but camera broke again so only a few photos.

KLINDT TROPHY TRIAL - 20 Feb 2011
By Bretton King

Fears that the neighbouring centre's Wallace Cup National S3 opener would deplete entries for the Swindon DMC's second round of the club championship proved unfounded last weekend when a batch of 55 riders disembarked onto platform 2 of the Old Station Yard venue at Hannington. Riders chuffed in from far and wide to do battle over a 4 lap 10 section course in dry yet chilly conditions over the cambered slopes that feature there.
 
"Fat Controller" for the day (aka clerk of the course) Lyndon Jack sent them off and from the outset, centre star, Lee Hassall, looked to be really focused for a win. Reigning club champion Rob Scott never gives anything less than 100% effort and shows no sign of parking up in a siding just yet, and he kept Lee homest all day, but a soft 5 on section 3 put too much daylight between the two contenders and with little pressure, Lee steamed to a sizeable 8 mark victory margin. Andy Noad has top credentials for winning but he was off the boil and found himself scrapping for third with evergreen David Bathe. By rights, David should have won as he outperformed Andy on the tricky section 9 by eight marks, but alas, David's slack 5's on sections 1 and 3 let Andy into third. Keeping the winning way in the family, Dean Hassall beat enduro-meister Keith Wooster by a massive 12 mark margin in the AB's, a class that could cope with a few more challengers.
 
The B class was as packed as ever and three runners were within touching distance of each other all day. Jeremy Orchard and Adrian Steele fronted-up for the duration, with Michael Maslin a hairs breadth away right to the end. Adrian was tied with Jeremy as they approached the penultimate section, and sadly for Adrian, a costly prod to terrafirma gave the win away, with Michael taking third. Andy Kibby had a good ride, two untimely 5's being the only real blemishes on his card, and giving us the prospect of seeing him in a podium position before too long. In the well stocked C class, the hard work and perseverance fnally paid off for Sherco mounted Liam Wooster as he won for the first time in his brief riding career, a solitary mark ahead of Andy Humphries. Not known for always keeping his concentration, Liam nailed the victory with a display of precise and careful line selection, which minimised mark loss and prevented a single five from hitting his card - well done to him. Another young rider who had great day on the pegs was Lewis Scott - riding in only his third trial he lost a creditable 26 marks that gave him fifth place, well ahead of some very seasoned riders. He too looks destined to follow in his father's footsteps and become a very handy rider.
 
Youth classes have been blessed with good numbers in the last two events, and this creates a great atmosphere. A class Ollie Humphries has only been riding a year or so, but on Sunday he opted to tackle the Expert route and he put in a fantastic ride to drop just 5 marks - a score that put him first in his class but more impressively, second overall!!! Destined for good things too... On the standard route A class, Victoria Payne netted the victory ahead of family member Lewis, winning handsomely - or rather - daintily. Alec Resek took the win in Youth B, but it should be mentioned that there was a real ding-dong battle going on in every class as 14 riders pitted themselves against each other - great to see. More of the same please! Next round is in May.
 
Premier       Lee Hassall   2ml
 
Best A         Rob Scott    10ml
 
Best AB       Dean Hassall  15ml
 
Best B         Jeremy Orchard 2ml
 
Best C         Liam Wooster  19ml
 
Best Yth A   Ollie Humphries 5ml
Expert
 
Best Yth A   Victoria Payne  21 ml
 
Best Yth B   Alec Resek   15ml
 
Best O/50    Nigel Tomkins  4 ml

 

SNOWRUN ENDURO, Sunday 13th February - by Neil Brown

Full article with photos can be downloaded here in PDF format

Ah here is my ride I mean limo! In other words Herman Wolfgang Villy Von Vooster (on account of his Germanic looking legs) has arrived to take us to the Snow Run Enduro. Aptly named seeing its blowing a gale and persisting with rain should be renamed as Mid Atlantic Force 10 Storm dumped on Wales. I`m going with Keith and Richard “why because I can” Peaker in Keith`s van with 2 bikes why 2 bikes because I bottled it on entering the event and in hindsight I`m glad I did seeing the state of some of the competitors coming into the pits.

Lyndon`s taking his truck (I wonder how he’s doing remembering to bring all his kit, gloves, petrol, bike etc even the disc lock key has been forgotten before, it’s like having a 40 year old son to worry about) with “Wing Nut” Andy Willis later to be known as Master Blaster and Dave “The Furniture I love to watch Lyndon drown his bike” Griffiths. New to the parenting game and boy has he got a shock coming Craig Beattie is driving up later with Mark “The Blister” Page.

Looks like I’ve got my work cut out being a Pit Bitch for this lot! Still being the eldest I have informed them all that I`m not too old to slap each and every one of them if they take liberties.

Uneventful journey to Richards cottage in Alltyblacca (to pronounce this correctly you need to have a heavy cold) and no comments were made on Keith’s driving abilities all journey what so ever!!!

Unloading the van when I hear lots of fuss and expletives coming from the Central Heating oil tank. Richards good environmental intentions of using some reclaimed “gas oil” from Swindon may have back fired as he may well of just fed the tank with either Truck cleaner, Concrete sealer or some other chemical yet to be determined but if anybody knows what is reddish, pink coloured and goes frothy when added to heating oil please let us know? After much debate we decide it’s too cold to do anything and put the boiler on and see if this stuff burns? Watch this space.

All the others arrive safely and as usual much piss taking, ribbing and whinging takes place during the evening curry and bear. Andy now known as Master Blaster wins hands down the old Gentlemen’s game of who can break wind the loudest and longest and having achieved this feat for over an hour and with his efforts leaving a parting in the shag pile rug he was sat on it’s not surprising he looked unwell before retiring to bed. Well done Andy we were all impressed.

I was disturbed several times during the night by a loud knocking noise only for it to stop as soon as I wake up to investigate. Lyndon informs me in the morning that it was him trying to stop me snoring. I apologise profusely and promise not to consume before  going to bed a Chicken Tika Bulti, Nan bread, cheese and biscuits, real ale and red wine if we are to share a room again. If he believes that he`ll believe anything!

Breakfast done and all vehicles loaded we head off to Llandovery and Cynghordy for the start of the event. It takes a lot longer than we anticipate and after several dropped calls (no signal) from Lyndon who cannot find the start, pit area and Keith doing a little of the course in his van (sneaky preview I think) we arrive at the start with not much time for scrutineering and signing on. Whilst this is happening I change into my waterproof clothing and OH boy do I need it it`s hammering down and blowing a hoolie. The signing on marquee is held down by a truck and still bouncing around in the wind threatening to lift off with all inside and end up in England - quick way home me thinks. Once waterproofed I start to set up the pit area.  Craig’s off first his kits there so I sort out what’s what, goggles, drink, petrol etc.  At this stage we are joined by Neil Ashton from up North, not his fault, never mind nice lad anyway.  Everybody makes the start and I see them off one by one.

Time to kill they will be at least 1 hour 15 min to 1 hour 30 mins before they are back, check the pits, cup of tea to warm up and try to stay out of the bad weather.  I promise to stay at the pits to watch and check everybody through the first lap, and then I was going to walk out into the forest to see some action. On enquiring with the Marshalls it seems I'd have to walk a bloody long way before I see anything just a couple of miles in either direction of fire road!! Sod that I'm soaking as it is! Neil’s in first with Craig hot on his heels- fuel, new goggles and drink, time 5mins before their check. Never heard Craig swear so much a young lad next to me waiting for his dad to come in was all ears and told his mum as soon as Craig had left. Got talking to the mum firstly apologising for the language and stated that although Craig was part of the SDMCC he was originally from the Manchester area, explains a lot she replies! Are you the Swindon lot she asks?  Oh god I think what have we done, I'm sure we didn't drink that much last night I can remember most of it. She informs me that the word around the pits is that we didn't like what we saw and we were on our way back to Swindon as earlier on in the morning a black truck with three bikes on (recognised by the bike numbers) was on its way back to Buillth following an ambulance. Turns out guess who Lyndon, (lost again) following the ambulance believing it to be going to the start only to find out it was heading into the forest to a pre ordained strategic spot, more than likely where Craig crashes. 

Keith was next in with 7 minutes to spare same routine as before, drink, petrol, goggles and gloves. Dave is in now and gets the same treatment both say the course is ride-able but difficult plenty of horrible slots you just have to waddle through if that's the correct term.  Both go off for their second lap and this time 2 timed tests. Now waiting for Richard, Lyndon, Andy and Mark to come in. Lyndon is in first and on time but informs me he has dropped 4 mins on the last check and can’t go out until 12:04. He has lost the felling in his fingers and believes 2 of them have duvet`ed What!! He explains that they feel like they’re still under the duvet when the rest of him is out of bed and rearing to go. Andy`s in next and has had enough "one lap to many" he says and concedes that doing another lap maybe foolish and we all have to go to work and make a living. So decides to quit while he’s ahead sensible lad. Lyndon decides to give his fingers more time to wake up and come out from under the duvet. Richards in now and he and Lyndon agree to carry on but only if they ride it as a trial, greenlaning style and promptly shoot off. Mark is in now and enjoying it although admits it’s hard work and has dropped some time.

Andy`s goes off to change and stow his kit and the best part gets me a cup of tea I`m bloody soaked and cold! I see the rest of them through their remaining laps without incident and then start to clear the pits and load up the van for the journey home.

Scores on the doors

 Craig Beattie 9th Expert 3rd E1 and gains notoriety in Enduro News report and supporting Utube clip including setting a new Guinness world record for "cameraman getting out the way of oncoming bike and rider whilst soiling himself”. Well done Craig Silver.

Dave Griffiths 10th Vet Expert 3rd E3 a great effort seeing as he has a dodgy liver so say, more investigation into this excuse sorry I mean reason is required. Bronze.

Hats off now to our Chairman Keith he came in 5th Clubman 3rd E3 and dropped no time, a great achievement seeing as he has not ridden competitively since the Natter jack in 2009. I`m sure it’s down to those German efficient legs!! Silver Well done Chairman Fritz.

Lyndon and Richard come after 1 3/4 laps with big smiles and satisfaction at what they`ve achieved, Lyndon`s fingers are still under the duvet.

Mark Page 27th Clubman mid table a grand effort and guess what no blisters. Bronze.

A great weekend was had by one and all with much merriment and escapades to be talked about at club nights for many a time to come. I would like to thank all at WTRA for a great event and the lads I went with for taking me along. I know it was only to be a Pit Bitch but I really enjoyed myself although I`m still trying to dry my kit out after a week. Sorry for the lack of photos the camera filled with rain water so I need to get an underwater one for next year.

Roll on the next event the Muntjack.

Neil   P.B

Webmaster note - thanks Neil for the report and the pit crewing - next time, could you make my toast in the morning a little more crispy with extra butter? Ta. 

 

BRIAN FREEGARD TRIAL REPORT, Sunday 9th January, Hannington.

'Freegard frenzy favours Franklin'

There can’t be many occasions when the effects of snow and ice can be viewed positively, but Swindon and District MCC has reason to be happy with the preceding month’s wintry conditions because it led to bumper turnout at the club’s opening trial of 2011. With frost still holding fast last Sunday, 65 riders arrived at Hannington’s famous Station Yard venue to get their blood pumping aboard a bike for the first time in a month. The 10-section lap provided the battleground for Round 1of their Club Championship.

The biggest belated Xmas present of the day was the attendance of thirteen youth riders – something that any Club is pleased to see as they are the future, and victorious on the day was Chris Langston on the standard A route while on standard B was B.Hayes. A number of the youth brigade opted to ride the harder route for each class, and Bertie Raines rode the full adult Expert route – dropping 53 marks was a good ride and he shows promise for the season. The ultra-competitive B class riders rode the AB route and they were led home by a scrap between British contender Victoria Payne and L.Bond. This went right down to the wire, with Victoria needing to clean the last section to win on a tie break. Sadly for her, a three ensued and second place with it.

Hat trick winning champion Rob Scott was back to begin the defence of his crown but he was usurped by new-boy Keith Brain who dropped only 4 marks for his tour. Fast improving Western centre rider Andy Ridley had a great ride to take third, only five marks behind The Champ. Jason Cole looked a bit ring-rusty and needed a towel after taking a dip in the brook – too much Christmas pud netted him fifth with 44 marks lost. Class B always provides a duel and pistols were once again drawn between Andy Perry and Adrian Steele. Their tussle is as traditional as turkey and stuffing, and on this occasion it was Andy that did the stuffing (just!) by a mere clean on the tie break, while newly upgraded Kevin Miller took fourth. The C class was headed by newbie M. Franklin as he blasted the opposition, 26 marks ahead of runner-up Nathan Kennedy and Stuart Brrome. Stuart staged a late charge at the end but his 3 mark loss on the banks of section 6 left him too much to do. The Over 50 class provides much entertainment and old-timer Graham “GL” Lavis proved there is life in the old dog yet by running a very close second to Brain Snr., who made a family double by winning. Oxford Ixion stalwart Kevin McCullagh eased round on his 4RT and looked effortless in places. It was also very pleasing to see Billy Andrews out on his Beta – a great character from Cheltenham who is always very tidy around a course. Finally, the twinshock group provided another close affair, with two Western centre maestros locking horns. Tim Wheeler was the victor over ever-steady Nigel Tomkins. Nigel was clean on all bar section 2, where all his marks went, the two on the final lap costing him the win. Martyn Wilmore took third but was well adrift at the close and only ahead of Mr. Yamaha (Craig Mawlam) by virtue of a tie breaker.

All-in-all, a great start to the series and it was nice to get back out on bikes, rather than dreaming about it. Next round is at the same venue on 20th February – we look forward to seeing you all.

 

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